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One day God asks a man to carry a rock to the top of the hill. When you get there he said, I will have a purpose for that rock. So the happy traveler glad to be able to assist God looks at God and agrees that this is something that he could do. He looked at the rock and at his schedule and felt very confident that this was not too much for him to handle. So the man left with God’s small rock on his journey to the top of the hill. Along the way the nice man meets his neighbor. They both stop and chat.
The neighbor realizing he is headed up the hill also to drop off a small rock asks the nice gentleman if he wouldn’t mind bringing his rock also since it was an inconvenient time for him and it would be doing him a great favor. So instead of doing it himself he asks his neighbor to bring his rock up the hill as well.
The good neighbor smiles and commits to taking his neighbors rock up the hill. As he trucks along his journey he meets a stranger, an older man who seems to have bitten off more than he can chew. He is trying to roll a small boulder up the side of the hill and realizes that this rock is more rock than he can handle, but the stubborn pride in him keeps him struggling along. The nice traveler feels bad for this old man and out of compassion asks the old man if he needs a hand getting the rock to the top of the hill.
The old man thrilled that someone was kind of enough to take this burden off his shoulders agrees to let the traveler take his rock up as well. So the old man gladly passes his rock off. The once happy traveler is now not so happy. He is tired and weary and cursing with each step of the way asking, “Why did I volunteer to do this”? He pushes harder and harder and with each step he realizes this journey is impossible with three rocks in tow. He stops and yells to God, “Dear God please help me”! I can’t do this anymore and the rocks you asked me to carry are too heavy. I am tired and weary. Out of nowhere the young traveler hears a soft voice saying,” My son I never asked you to carry the burdens of your neighbor and the stranger you met. I simply asked you to take this small rock to the top of the hill, but because you lost focus you now feel unable to complete your task”.
Sometimes I find myself doing the same thing. I do things I don’t want to do. I do things out of priority causing myself to be stressed. I even do things out of guilt because other people think I should do them. Other times I am sensitive to the needs of others and feel that I should put everyone’s needs first before mine. The consequence of these extra tasks is that I lose focus and get side tracked from what I am suppose to be doing. I realized it became a matter of what am I capable of doing and learning to say no to things because I needed to stay focused and sane.
Sometimes we naturally feel the need to keep taking on responsibility because there is a need (trust me I fall into this category), but we never stop to think what suffers as a result of adding additional tasks to our routine. I can account for several times putting other people ahead of my own family and asking my family’s needs to come last because someone has an urgent matter.
This is ok, but it can’t be all the time. More of the time, I fall victim to the person that just wants an ear, but doesn’t actually want to change their life –so their problem never goes away and you become an enabler. I have missed date nights with my husband and playtime with my kids because I have taken unnecessary burdens on. Sometimes I needed to get my priorities and say I am sorry you are going through this tough time do you mind if I call you back later I am in the middle of something.
I have also learned to get rid of those feelings of guilt that people make you feel because you cannot always be there. I have also learned how to respect others when they say no instead of wondering, “what is the big deal for them to commit to something”? We need to learn a healthy balance between giving our time and using our time. We are all busy people and we should want to help others as much as we can, but we need to realize we can’t always do it, we can’t do it alone, and we need to set our own priorities.
I am the queen of putting aside things I have to do for things that I want to do. In the end I get more stressed out because then I am left with a shorter amount of time to do the things I have to do. So whenever you take on something more than is required, make sure that you are able to take on the extra responsibility without losing your mind. We can’t always be in control of these situations, but we can think twice about those “extra” things that we add to our plate. Sometimes we think adding extra play dates and activities are best for our kids and we run them from here to there all day long and we realize that sometimes we have over whelmed them and tired them out.
So be cautious of your time and your schedule. Make sure that those extra things that you take on are coming from the heart and make you happy, not something you dread and become anxious about. Learn to balance yourself so that you can stay on focus and point for your purpose in life. Help each day to count and be productive.
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