Happiness is a state of mind not a way of life.
 
 
Ever hear someone say I just want to be happy….
Happiness is the best feeling. For that moment you feel good and everything is great. But what happens to the moment of happiness when something interrupts it? I’ll give you a simple example I encountered. After a hectic week I was finally able to steal a few hours to myself. I dropped off my daughter at a birthday party and sighed. It was a wonderful moment thinking what I was going to do for 2 hours to myself.  I knew I had to pick something close, so I decided to bop over to whole foods and walk down the aisles. Call me crazy but I thought to myself I want to get a coffee and check out some of the handmade lotions and soaps they had. So the first part of my plan was working. I got myself a coffee and began to wander. At the very moment that I said to myself ahhhhh…. I have sometime to just stroll around and actually look at what I want to look at and I began to sample my first lotion. Just then, my cell phone rang. Oh who could this be I wondered? I was happy to think it was someone I could just say,” hey I’m having an alone moment can I call you back?” But sure enough it was the party place where my daughter had just been dropped off. They said that she all of the sudden became sad and wanted me to come and get her. Of course she did. It was the Law of Parents. My cart with one thing in it, my hands lathered with lotion not yet rubbed in and a coffee with one sip taken. I was torn between wanting my alone time and feeling bad about my daughter’s sadness. I thought to myself, this was all too good to be true… I left my cart and quickly ran to the rescue of my daughter that missed me so much. (Never before has this happened). I thought how quickly that happy moment had passed. None the less I was happy when I saw my daughter’s sad face turn happy and I remembered that there will always be another chance to get that happy moment back. I think these things often happen in life. We set ourselves with expectations and thoughts of how our life is suppose to be or how a situation is suppose to turn out and then when it doesn’t turn out the way we thought it was going to we feel disappointed and sad. We begin to dwell on the things that we missed out on or the way we had dreamt of it being rather than on what it is. I call this the “dreamy state of being”. As little girls we grow up with fairy tales and happy endings. Noone ever wrote the sequel of REALITY… We too often trade in our happiness for that dreamy state hoping that somehow there is something we can do or someway we can control the situation to get me back to that time of feeling happy. But the sad thing is that no matter how hard we try and how much effort we put into it we never quite get that perfect way. I used to know a lady that had a perfectly peaceful house. Immaculately cleaned, everything had a place, things are organized and I used to wonder what I have to do to get this wonderful peace in my house - everything is put together.. And then I realized the family never spent much time together, there was an air of unhappiness between the family members and then I said to myself, there is a trade. There always is a trade. Next time you think the grass is greener on the other side ask yourself what must I trade to get it, because there is always a trade that you can’t see. The deception that we can treat HAPPINESS as a way of life instead of a temperorary state of mind is a deceitful and dangerous thought. If we remain in our lives with the goal of always being happy we are going to be disappointed when we realize the multitude of possibilities that hinge on that feeling of happiness. There are way too many things that we would have to be in control of and be aware of to maintain this state of mind. Learning to be content in our current situation helps us to focus on that feeling of happiness. When the thought of disappointment seeps into our lives, take a look around and think about how much less fortunate people are. It is sad but in this world of comparing our lives to others we feel that gratefulness when we see someone less fortunate. Why can’t we feel it both ways? Be content at what you have at the moment. God warns us to keep our eyes focused on what is ahead and not look back. Don’t compare the lives of others to yours and feel like something is missing. Everyone has a set purpose in life and all of us have different means to achieve them. When we stop our minds from wandering and keep our eyes focused we realize that we have that peace and happiness within us and we are in control of that. I’m great at cliché sayings. Great at getting them wrong..lol, but I think the saying goes, when life hands you lemons-make lemonade. It’s our attitude and gratitude that makes us better people and allows to live in the state of happiness.

 

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